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About Author: Joey Alesia

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http://www.vagary.tv
Description
Joey's adventure into the realm of video games began at 3 when Nintendo first hit the West. He grew up a Nintendo fan and ended up branching out to Playstation when FF7 hit and XBox when Oblivion hit the 360. He's not huge on first person shooters or sports games but definitely enjoys a good RPG or survival horror game. His all-time favorite series is definitely The Legend of Zelda, followed extremely closely by Metal Gear. Joey has a firm belief that games should be treated with respect when they are made and that the classics should never be overlooked.

Posts by Joey Alesia

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Just In Bailey: Burning the Midnight Oil

Once upon a time, I took part in a sacred video game tradition: the midnight release.  I was young and able to stay awake.  Nowadays, I’m lucky if I’m up past 10 o’clock at night.  It’s actually kind of sad.  What makes the midnight release so cool?  Why would anyone want to stay up so late just for a video game?

Midnight releases evoke a certain excitement that doesn’t exist when you waltz into a GameStop at 10 in the morning, and are judged for not having a real job by the soccer mom going into the Old Navy next door.  There is a nervous anticipation in the air as people shuffle about in line, watching the clock tick down to that mystical minute after midnight.  And trust me when I say that minute is taken very seriously.  There will be no sale until those 60 seconds are up.  The buzz in the air is palpable.  Some places even have activities or giveaways for the faithful gamers.

The crowd that midnight releases draw is of a totally different caliber as well.  There isn’t the occasional group of kids or that one fool who acts like he knows what he’s talking about but just sounds foolish when he’s vomiting false information.  You know the one I’m talking about.  He struts in with his nose in the air, goes up to the counter, starts talking to the GameStop employee and asks for “that new Madden game.”  Then he turns to you and tells you all about how he’s excited for the new Call of Duty game that actually came out last year.  We’ve all seen this guy and it takes everything in our power not to laugh in his face.  But, I digress.  The crowd at the midnight release is made of fans, real fans.  You’ll even get the cosplayers.  These are the people who know what they buying and why they’re buying it.

I’ve tried to go to a few midnight releases recently and realized it just isn’t worth it anymore.  First, I’m already exhausted after a long day at work.  Then, I’ll get the game or system and get home.  By this time it’s half past midnight.  I have to go to work the next day. So, essentially, I’m losing sleep to get a game I won’t even be able to play.  But, that’s the price of growing up.

Getting a game at midnight is a sweet perk if you aren’t in the same situation I’m in, or if it comes out on the weekend.  There’s a certain coolness to having a game before the “normal” people who have patience.  The atmosphere, the environment, and the people make it a cool experience.  And really, who needs sleep?  We’ll sleep plenty when we’re dead, right?

 

 

 

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metroid, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. What started as an alternate perspective on different parts of video games has since become a more wide-ranged look at the gaming industry from a gamer’s perspective with over 25 years of gaming knowledge and a twisted sense of humor.  Follow Joey on Twitter (@wrkngclsswrtr) or email him at Joey.Alesia@Vagary.tv.

 

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Review: Xenoblade Chronicles

There is an ongoing debate in the gaming community.  Many seem to think the Japanese-style role-playing  genre is dead.  They say the Western-style has taken over for better or worse.  To those non-believers I say this: JRPGs live on.  Nintendo and Monolithsoft have created a masterpiece in Xenoblade Chronicles for the fading Wii console.  Everything in this game shines.  The story, the cast of characters, the gameplay, everything comes together in a package that is well worth the price of admission.  Final Fantasy can learn a thing or two from this game.  Just make sure you have a lot of time to spare.  Once Xenoblade Chronicles hooks you, it takes you on a long ride that doesn’t slow down until the credits roll.

Being on the Wii may give some people pause.  The graphics aren’t high definition, but this is a perfect example of why graphics don’t make the game. The views are still stunning and the character models detailed enough.  The gameplay is fluid, only slowing down if there is a great deal of action during a battle.  Xenoblade allows you to use either the wiimote and nuchuku or the classic controller.  I tried both and preferred the classic controller myself.  I also found it amazing they were able to cram such a huge game onto one disc.

Not many games I’ve played recently have provided a reason for me to care a lot about the cast of characters.  Xenoblade’s cast definitely scratches that itch.  Yeah, there are some bad jokes, and the characters can be overly dramatic, but I was legitimately emotionally involved.  The voice acting was on point. There was genuine personality given to each of the characters.   One character sounded a lot like Ricky Gervais , which made his bad jokes even funnier.

Xenoblade Chronicles also has one of the better stories I’ve experienced in a while.  It begins with a battle between the Mechonis and the Bionis, two giant beings looking to destroy one another.  They injure each other to the point that they stop moving.  It is revealed that these giants are actually home to different beings.  The Mechonis is home to the Mechons, which are machine-like in nature.  The Bionis houses the Homs, or humans, the Noppon, and others.  There is a great war between the Mechons and Homs.  A year later, we meet the main character, Shulk.  After a great loss, Shulk and his best friend, Reyn start off on a quest for revenge that turns out to be something much bigger than they ever imagined.

Aside from the main story, there are literally hundreds of side-quests you can undertake.  These can range from simple fetch quests and monster hunting quests, to rebuilding an entire colony.  Xenoblade has the traditional gain experience and level up system with a twist.  Practically everything you do earns you experience, from completing quests to just finding landmarks, you’ll gain experience, ability points (AP), and skill points (SP).  These AP and SP can be used to enhance each character and allow for some customization depending on your play style.  There is also an Affinity system that tracks how much the relationships between characters grow, which in turn provides you with added skills and perks.  Characters can even collect and craft gems to enhance their gear.

There are no random encounters, which is a god-send.  Enemies roam the field of play.  Some may attack you if they see or hear you, others will only attack if provoked.  The battle system is fast-paced.  You have three characters fighting at a time.  You directly control one character, most times it’s Shulk.  The character uses regular attacks automatically.  You can choose to use different acquired skills, which will have to recharge after use.  These have different affects , such as causing status ailments, knocking an enemy over, etc.  The system is easy enough to grasp, but difficult to master.  One thing I did learn the hard way is that level-grinding can be necessary at times, especially toward the end of the game.

The only complaints I have about Xenoblade Chronicles are skin deep.  Sometimes the action can get really frantic where one wrong button press could cause a 20 minute boss battle to end in disaster.  There is a pop-up menu which allows access to the options, quests,etc.  If you don’t exit out of this menu , it stays up and can lead to you unintentionally going to a menu when you mean to talk to someone or battle an enemy.  Oh, and the name of the sword Shulk uses (which also plays a big part in the story), the Monado, is a stupid name for a weapon.  With awesome sword names like Masamune and Excalibur, Monado just seems weak.

I loved Xenoblade Chronicles.  It was a refreshing take on the JRPG.  I hope gaming companies see how well this game works and take notes.  I also hope that gamers don’t discount this game because it is on the Wii.  We need games like this to balance out the endless stream of shooters and sports titles.  With  great characters, well-designed gameplay, a thoughtfully touching story, Xenoblade Chronicles provides over 100 hours of awesomess that should not be missed.

Pros:

-Well thought-out story

-Touching cast of characters

-Fast-paced, tight, and balanced gameplay

-Tons to do.  The game can last over 100 hours and there is a New Game + available upon completion

 

Cons:

-Why didn’t this game come out sooner?  The Wii could have used more games like this

 

Score:  5/5

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Just In Bailey: You’ve Got No Friend In Me

I like RPGs.  Simple enough statement, I think.  I’ve played a lot of RPGs during my gaming years.  Recently, I picked up Xenoblade Chronicles for the Wii (be sure to check out my review to see my thoughts).  While I was playing, I noticed something: only a few characters participate in battles.  This is an issue that many gaming worlds seem to have.  The question is why?  Why, and what are the others doing while you’re getting your behind handed to you in a boss fight?

Where is the teamwork in this?  You would think that with so many teammates, you’d have a ton of help.  A behemoth comes out to fight you and only 3 out of 7 companions take up arms against the beast?  What are they doing?  I tend to think they’re just sitting on the sideline, taking in the battle with a soda and a box of popcorn.  Saving the world isn’t really high on their list of priorities.  They just want to see a good fight.  Obviously, they’re traveling with you.  You can change their gear and spend tons of money on them.  Do they join in the fight though?  Nope.  They show no such gratitude.  You even see them in the cutscenes, sometimes contributing to riling the bad guy up so he gets ticked off, goes Super Saiyan, and wipes the floor with the 3 or 4 fools who decide to fight.  It’s like hiding behind the big guy in the gang and egging on the opposing gang.

And then, more often than not, the peanut gallery reaps the rewards that the fighting members worked so hard and risked life and limb to obtain.  It’s a real crappy situation.  They not only get the tangible gear and accessories, they also get the experience and get to share in the monetary spoils.  It’s amazing that they are able to leech off of the hard work of others.  No shame I tell you.

Now, I understand there are times where the party has to split up and tackle different objectives to achieve the same ends.  Take Final Fantasy VI for example.  There is a part in the game where the party is split into 3 different groups and each group has to work on their own to find their way to the secret meeting place of the underground group, The Returners.  And later in the game, there is another split to get through to the final boss, Kefka.  When the party faces Kefka, they don’t all fight at once, but, everyone does have a chance of participating.  Other RPG parties could learn a thing or two from the party of Final Fantasy VI.

 

Teamwork is key in any situation.  RPGs need to remember the old adage that there is no “I” in team.  If there is an enemy kicking the crap out of your friends, get in there and help them out.  The world is not going to get saved if you decide to just sit on the bench and suck up all the glory you didn’t earn.

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metroid, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. What started as an alternate perspective on different parts of video games has since become a more wide-ranged look at the gaming industry from a gamer’s perspective with over 25 years of gaming knowledge and a twisted sense of humor.  Follow Joey on Twitter (@wrkngclsswrtr) or email him at Joey.Alesia@Vagary.tv.

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Just In Bailey: Say “Fuzzy Pickles”

Once a year, the Chicagoland area is overrun with a totally different breed of people.  Grown men dressed as Sailor Moon are hanging around with girls dressed as Cloud from Final Fantasy VII.  It is truly a sight to behold.  What makes the sight even better are the looks on the faces of people who just don’t get it.  So, what is this magical event?  Why, it’s Anime Central, or ACEN for short.  ACEN is a three day event that pops up between April and June every year at the Donald E. Stephens Convention Center in Rosemont, a town just outside of Chicago.  What makes ACEN so special?  Follow me on a short journey if you will.

ACEN is a convention that showcases not only anime and manga, but video games as well.  The convention has several components.  There’s the exhibition hall, which is the area where merchants hawk their wares.  You’ll find tons of cool stuff to spend your hard-earned cash on.  There is a wide variety of graphic t-shirts to buy.  Forget Hot Topic.  If you want something cool or witty or just plain geeky to wear, this is the place to get it.  You will also find all sorts of replica weaponry to buy.  The only issue with that is you need a place to store it once you buy it.  ACEN is extremely strict on their weapon policy.  The hall also has toys, books, movies, and even import video games.  It’s a very dangerous place for your wallet to be as you could easily spend a grand and not realize it.

Another cool area to visit is the artist alley.  Independent and starving artists inhabit this area of the convention.  The talent here is pretty amazing.  What’s even cooler is that for a small fee, you can commission an artist to draw something of your choosing.  Ever want to see Link and Cloud locked in combat?  All you need to do is just ask.  Not only will you find some pretty sweet drawings, there are also handmade plush dolls, articles of clothing and more pins than you can count.

A lot of the pictures you can buy are prints.  Most of the original art can be found in the auction area where you can place bids or purchase pieces outright.  Just like the exhibition hall, the artist alley is another place where you can drop a great deal of money in a short period of time.

When you aren’t spending time and money, you can visit one of dozens of panels during the ACEN weekend. These panels are open to anyone and each has a specific topic.  Sometimes they are run by professionals in the anime or gaming worlds.  Other times, the panels can be run by just passionate fans.  We went to a panel this time that was Professor Layton themed.  The folks running it put together a puzzle competition.  There were 4 rounds of 10 minutes each.  The participants split into groups and each group received a packet of puzzles.  Every puzzle was worth a certain number of picarts (the points in the Professor Layton games).  The group with the most picarts competed in a final round.  The winning group received a small Layton doll and the grand prize was a larger doll.  These panels allow for great times with people and some even allow for quality discussion.

 

What makes ACEN such a great convention isn’t the art or the merch or the discussions.  What makes ACEN an experience is the cosplay.  It isn’t just Wookies and Storm Troopers here.  That isn’t to say you won’t find one.  The ACEN cosplay covers all areas of pop culture.  We saw people dressed as the White Power Ranger, Cloud, Mario, and even Doctor Who.  The article would go on and on with the different cosplayers we saw.  They even have photo shoots for like-dressed individuals.  The first year I went to ACEN, I dressed as Solid Snake and was part of a shoot with all kinds of Metal Gear-themed cosplayers.

People who don’t understand the anime or video game cultures may think ACEN is just a bunch of dorks dressing up like fools.  I think they can learn a thing or two from the convention.  What I love more than anything, what makes ACEN such a cool event, is the excitement and acceptance.  You can be anyone — or anything — you want and people will treat you no different.  Actually, the more unique you are, the more people will stop and ask to take your picture.  ACEN is a shining example of how tolerant people can be if they choose to.

So, if you live in or around the Chicago, or even if you’re from Alaska, I urge you to check out ACEN if you can.  It’s not just a typical convention.  Bring your craziest costume and get into character.  Bring your cash and your credit card.  Bring your camera.  And if someone stops you to take a picture don’t forget to say “Fuzzy Pickles.”

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metroid, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. What started as an alternate perspective on different parts of video games has since become a more wide-ranged look at the gaming industry from a gamer’s perspective with over 25 years of gaming knowledge and a twisted sense of humor.  Follow Joey on Twitter (@wrkngclsswrtr) or email him at Joey.Alesia@Vagary.tv.

 

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Just In Bailey: It’s a Hard Knock Life

I’ve been playing video games since I was 3.  I haven’t stopped and don’t plan on stopping any time soon.  Or any time later for that matter.  Everyone who knows me knows that I’m a gamer.  Heck, I’m wearing a Wind Waker shirt as I type this article.  What I find funny is that when people try to relate to me, they do it through video games (some have failed miserably, but I try not to tell them that).  What’s even funnier to me is that when I was a kid I was made fun of for playing video games, by the same types of people who are now trying to relate to me.

Growing up as a gamer was fun at home, but the cause of a lot of strife at school, on the playground, at summer camp, and everywhere else that jocks ruled.  The popular kids made me feel out of place for liking video games.  While they were shooting hoops with dreams of becoming the next Jordan or Bird, I was playing Jordan vs. Bird on the NES.  I was laughed at for reading Game Informer instead of Sports Illustrated.  I was actually pretty lucky to have friends who played video games as well.  The popular kids made fun out of all of us for this.

 

Nowadays, gaming is not so much part of the counter culture as it once was.  Gamers are now anyone from kids to grandparents.  Age and social status make no difference.  Actually, the more I think on it, gaming is the great equalizer, similar to a metal chair in a WWE match.  Yeah, I may not be athletic, but I will whoop some ass in Mortal Kombat.  And what’s more embarrassing really?  Go ahead and dunk over me.  I’m only 5’ 5”.  You’ll change your tune pretty quick when I’m holding your spinal column in my hands.

This article ended up more as a stream of consciousness piece than I originally intended.  I guess my point here is that I’ve noticed a change in the way gamers are perceived by those outside of our realm.  It’s cooler to be good at Call of Duty than it is to have a mean crossover.  And if you don’t have a mean crossover in real life, you can still have one in NBA 2k12.  I’m happy to see it as an accepted form of society. I would like kids to know it’s cool to be a gamer.  It really is the age of the geek.  Video games may be a scapegoat for media and irresponsible or ignorant parents, but I’ve made more friends with my Hadoken than I ever did with my fade-away jumper.

On a side note, next week I’m going to be at the Anime Central (ACEN) convention in Rosemont, IL.  I’m hoping to have a lot of cool pictures for you faithful readers out there, and some interesting stories to tell.

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metroid, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. What started as an alternate perspective on different parts of video games has since become a more wide-ranged look at the gaming industry from a gamer’s perspective with over 25 years of gaming knowledge and a twisted sense of humor.  Follow Joey on Twitter (@wrkngclsswrtr) or email him at Joey.Alesia@Vagary.tv.

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Just In Bailey: Parental Advisory

Video games are more main stream now than they have ever been.  Gamers aren’t just nerds and geeks.  Even the elderly are gaming.  Due to the surge in gaming popularity, the media has sought to bash games as mindless and not educational.  They knock on gaming as a waste of time and the cause of anger issues in children.  And just when this young industry takes a step forward in becoming accepted by society, some idiot goes and screws it up.

I read an article this week about a 20 year old gamer who got upset at his son for crying while he was playing a game.  The guy was so angry he shook the 3 week old baby and swore at him.  Later that night, after coming home from work, the baby woke up crying and the man held the baby while the mother prepared a bottle.  He fell asleep with the baby in his arms.  When he woke up, the baby was bleeding.  At the hospital, the baby was pronounced dead.

I’m going to be a first-time father in about 5 months and reading this story made me sick to my stomach.  I could never imagine hurting my child over something as trivial as a video game.  This was a 3 week old child.  How screwed up is this man’s priorities that he chose video games over his baby?  Why is he procreating?  The same example  happened just a couple years ago.  When Farmville became a hit, a mother shook her child because the 3 month old was interrupting her gaming.   And this sort of thing is happening way too often.  Which is why I feel the need to give some advice to gaming parents: from one gamer to another, get your head right.  Don’t put video games before your child.

This is still a young industry and one that I’m happy to be a part of.  It is an industry I want to protect.  If you like playing video games, even if it’s casually, you need to do it responsibly.  If your baby is crying, put the damn controller down and be a parent.  There will come a time when your kid is grown up enough that you can take time to play video games (maybe even together!~Ed. Note – Jeremy).  Until that time, act like a friggin’ adult or don’t have kids.  I don’t think these people realize the harm they are causing.  You take an innocent life because you can’t stand being a parent.  Not to mention, then the game gets blamed for the idiotic action you took.  The news media just loves it when video games can be blamed for something this severe.

Video games don’t hurt kids.  Video games don’t hurt anyone.  Irresponsibility and being messed up in the head hurts people.  Activist groups and politicians and the news media are always so quick to blame video games for the ills of the world.  Did they ever stop to think that maybe they need to look at the parents?  Wait, more importantly, do they ever stop to think period?  Like I said before, if you can’t handle being a parent, and that means putting your child before everything else in the world, then you should not be having kids.  If you put video games first and have the gall to do any sort of harm to your child, there’s a special kind of hell for people like you.

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metriod, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. Each week Joey will challenge you to look at a different perspective of the characters, gameplay, and/or plot in your favorite games. Chat up your thoughts below, or send Joey an e-mail at Joey.Alesia@vagary.tv and remember to follow him on Twitter @wrkngclsswrtr.

 

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Just In Bailey: Brains…BRAINS!

There was a time…when I was so brokenhearted.  Brokenhearted, bloodied, dragging my feet, I was hurt.  And yet, all I wanted to do was eat.  And there were others like me.  Hundreds, thousands of us, all craving our next meal.  Death wasn’t much of a friend of mine.  I went from the big screen to the small screen to the handheld.  I am the undead.  I am a…wait!  Are we supposed to use the “Z” word?  Well, either way, I want to take a look at some of the games of my people and see what made them great.  Great, that is, until the world of gaming was completely overrun with zombie games like some sort of outbreak.  These are my top three favorite zombie games:

3.  The Dead Rising Series
Frank West and Chuck Greene have a tough task.  They both end up trapped, with thousands upon thousands of the undead looking for their next meal.  The Dead Rising series allows gamers a lot of freedom.  There is freedom in where to go and what to do.  There is freedom in how to dress and how to dispatch of the multitude of zombie fodder just ambling about.  The stories of West and Greene take a total back seat to the action and humor that the Dead Rising games provide.  The only thing I dislike is the time limit.  Everything has a time limit.  It makes sense within the context of the story but it has a tendency to put a damper on the game.  With the release of Dead Rising 2: Off the Record, Capcom provided a sandbox mode without a time limit.  Unfortunately, these games can get somewhat monotonous.  Despite that, the Dead Rising series is a fun time had by all; save the undead of course.

2. Zombies Ate My Neighbors
Yep, that’s right.  Remember this gem of the Super Nintendo era?  Forget Left 4 Dead and Dead Island and the rest of the new generation of zombie games.  This was the original zombie action game.  Everything from the box art to the 2-player co-op gameplay, this game was awesome.  It had a very campy horror theme and didn’t just have zombies as enemies.  Players faced off against werewolves, vampires, and numerous other creepy crawly nightmarish creatures while trying to rescue their remaining neighbors.  Even the main characters, Zeke and Julie had a crazy cartoony look to them.  Zombies Ate My Neighbors was a great action game that was totally unappreciated until it became a cult classic.  Luckily, it’s available on the Wii Virtual Console for a new generation or for those of us who love the classics.

1. The Resident Evil Series (1-Code Veronica)
I know, obvious right?  Resident Evil brought zombies front and center in the video game world.  And the reason I’m only including the first three numberedgames and Code Veronica is because the enemies in four and five weren’t technically zombies.  You have to come back from the dead to be a zombie, being just “infected” doesn’t cut it.  The story of the Umbrella Corporation and the zombie outbreak may be campy horror, but it is still entertaining.  The voice acting may be god-awful, but lines like “Barry.  Where’s Barry?” and “I hope this is not Chris’s blood” are some of the most memorable lines in video games.  Resident Evil has gone more action than horror as of late, and it seems this is the direction it will continue.  I think that’s a shame.  I really enjoy being scared when playing a video game, and the Resident Evil games provided hours upon hours of sweaty palms and screams.

So, there you have it.  These are my top zombie video games.  My hope for the future of zombie games is that the industry slows down on them.  These things are cyclical.  Vampires, zombies, Ricky Martin, they are popular, fade away for a bit, and then come back.  What are some of your favorite games starring the shambling undead?

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metriod, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. Each week Joey will challenge you to look at a different perspective of the characters, gameplay, and/or plot in your favorite games. Chat up your thoughts below, or send Joey an e-mail at Joey.Alesia@vagary.tv and remember to follow him on Twitter @wrkngclsswrtr.

 

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Vita Review: Escape Plan

Being a good friend can be taxing,  but is very rewarding in the end.  Whether it’s helping them through relationship issues or saving them from captivity, you can make a world of difference in someone’s life.  Escape Plan for Sony’s new Playstation Vita is a testament to the importance of friendship and quick reflexes, but mostly friendship.

The story unfolds with characters Lil and Laarg are being held captive by the diabolical Bakuki.  What narrative there is plays out through still images.  The story really isn’t the main aspect of Escape Plan, but there are some adorable moments.  I found Escape Plan to be pretty charming, and heart-warming.  In a gaming world of death and destruction, it is refreshing to have a feel-good game.

Escape Plan’s gameplay serves a major purpose: it showcases the Vita’s touch capabilities.  Almost everything is done via touch screen, save for camera controls.  You control Lil and Laarg, sometimes separately, sometimes together.  In order to get them to walk, you swipe across them in the direction they need to move.  Occasionally, the game requires you to pinch the front screen and back panel, such as when Lil has a bit of coffee and needs to scoot quickly, or he sucks on some helium and needs some released in a flatulent manner.  The controls are pretty intuitive, although I would sometimes find myself hitting the back touch panel on accident, and occasionally with hazardous results.  But that’s more due to the system’s design, so I can’t really fault the developers.

Each stage is broken up into several rooms.  Each room is a puzzle in itself and most everything can be deadly.  The puzzles can be challenging, but they are never frustrating.  It takes careful timing to make sure Lil and Laarg don’t fall too far without a platform, or get hit by spinning fan blades.  The environment is just as deadly as the enemies.  Escape Plan is great for short bursts of play, as well as longer sessions.  It barely takes a minute to clear a room.  The challenge lies in getting through a room quickly and with as few moves as possible.

You are ranked on a scale of three stars, and your total deaths with each character are tallied on the numbers on their chests.  Mine totaled around 70 for Lil and 50 for Laarg.  As a side note — I missed this until late in the game — there are different signs hidden throughout the rooms that you can collect.

What I enjoyed most about Escape Plan was the style.  Lil and Laarg aren’t overly detailed, but they are lovable.  The enemies scattered throughout the rooms look like Shy Guys from the Mario games, but they definitely have more personality.  The black and white visuals are gorgeous on the Vita’s OLED screen.  Each object really pops.  The death splats and fart noises are hilarious.  Escape Plan’s soundtrack is also phenomenal.  The classical tracks really add to the game’s charming personality.  There’s also an awesome rendition of “Lean On Me” at the end of the game that got me singing along.

All in all, I really enjoyed Escape Plan.  My only real gripe is the price tag.  $15 may be a little steep for some people, especially after having dropped $250-$300 on the Vita itself.  It’s also only available on the Playstation Store.  However, if you’re looking for a way to show off your new Vita to friends and family, Escape Plan is the right game.  It is a charming puzzle game that anyone can enjoy and a refreshing break from the multitude of “blockbuster” releases that seem to pop up every other week.

Pros:
-Charming gameplay
-Challenging Puzzles
-Good showcase of the Playstation Vita’s controls

Cons:
-$15 price tag might be a bit steep for some
-It’s over too quickly

Rating: 5/5

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Vita Review: Hustle Kings

I am awful at pool.  I can’t break to save my life.  Usually, my only hope of winning is if my opponent goofs up.  Luckily, there are pool video games.  At least when I play pool in electronic form I have a fighting chance.  After playing Hustle Kings for the PS Vita, I feel like a real pool shark.  Well, more pool guppy, but at least I’m some sort of pool playing fish.

Some developers try to put in a nonsense story mode in a game that doesn’t need a story mode.  Hustle Kings is a pool game that, thankfully, has no story mode.  There is a Career Mode, but there is no overarching narrative to drive it.  You play pool, bottom line.

Fortunately, Hustle Kings does pool justice.  There are three different ways to control the pool cue that range from just swiping your finger back and releasing like pinball to total manual control that can be a bit touchy (pun intended).  The ball physics are as close to real as I’ve seen in a pool game.  You even have your choice of different colored chalks, some of which grant you special abilities.  There are also three different camera angles: behind the cue ball, overhead, and free.  I found the free camera to be pretty useless and kind of gimmicky.  Moving the Vita moves the camera and can be nauseating.  I mainly used the overhead view unless I was fine-tuning my shot.

Shooting pool in Hustle Kings is simple.  There is a pool cue on the right side of the screen and a cue ball in the bottom left corner.  The ball in the corner is used for spin and trick shots and can be used with the touch screen or the right analog stick.  The cue on the right is self-explanatory.  You swipe down and then swipe up to hit the cue ball.  Depending on the degree of control, the pool cue may not hit with 100% accuracy.  While playing the game on the train, the rocking caused me to swipe the cue to the side a bit and messed up some of my shots.  There is also an aiming indicator that greatly aids pool guppies such as myself figure out where a shot will most likely go.  This indicator isn’t 100% accurate because of the power and accuracy that the player still has to put into the shot, but it definitely helps a lot and makes the game more enjoyable, at least to me.

Speaking of enjoyment, I found many different options in Hustle Kings that kept me playing.  There is the obvious one-on-one exhibition match versus the computer as well as career mode and tournaments.  Every pool variation you can think of is here from standard US 8-Ball to Cutthroat.  Hustle Kings also sports different bonus games such as beat-the-clock, where you have a certain amount of time to clear the table of eight balls, to survivor, where you have one shot to sink four balls that are in a straight line.  There are also trick shot challenges and online play.  Players can even use in-game currency to buy new chalk, cues, balls, avatars, and even bonus games and trick shots.  The Playstation Store (at this point in time) offers different chalks, a Snooker Pack, and for those who don’t have time to unlock it all manually, a pack that unlocks everything.

Hustle Kings does pool and does it well.  Aside from some bad techno music, I really enjoyed everything Hustle Kings had to offer.  It also allows for cross-platform play with the PS3, which I did not have a chance to try out.  One nice feature about this is that when you buy one version, the other is free. Once I am able to test it out, I’ll post my thoughts in a Just In Bailey article.  If you enjoy pool, or want to enjoy it but are no good at the real thing, Hustle Kings is a good game.  The $10 purchase price might be a turn-off for some considering there are similar games on the iTunes App Store for much cheaper.  Be you a pool shark or pool guppy, Hustle Kings is a sea of features that will keep you entertained.

Pros:
-Easy to pick up and play
-Gives people who can’t play pool in real life hope
-Tons of features
-No pointless story mode

Cons:
-Gimmicky third camera control
-Somewhat of a high price point
-Not much customization
-Pay real money to unlock everything?  Really?

Score: 4/5

3

Just In Bailey: Drowning In My Sorrows

Last week I visited with some of the toughest enemies in video games.  This week I want to explore the bane of every gamer’s existence: the water level.  From Super Mario Bros. to today, water levels have teased us, taunted us, and cost us several controllers.  Let’s take a look and see why these evil creations plague us so.

Most gamers experience their first water level in Super Mario Bros.  The serene music lulls you into a false sense of security as you are accosted by Cheep Cheeps and Bloopers.  Real world science also need not apply as Mario is able to breathe underwater for the entire level, as well as shoot fireballs.  In order to pass these levels unscathed, you need patience and good timing.  It also doesn’t help that the developers were sadistic enough to play off your greed and place coins extremely close to chasms.

Speaking of chasms, why is it Mario dies when he falls in one in a water level?  Is there too much water pressure?  Obviously, he doesn’t have issues breathing.  Pressure would have to be the only explanation.  It’s a good thing the water levels in Super Mario Bros. aren’t too difficult.  Actually, they make for good training for the levels to come in future games.

You can’t talk water levels without at least mentioning the notorious Water Temple from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.  There was no time limit to this stage, but Link did have to breathe, and that complicated things unless you had the blue tunic.  It also didn’t help that the level contained a convoluted puzzle requiring raising and lowering the water to get to different passages and doors. And don’t get me started on the obnoxious jumping evil clams with spiked rears.  It did have a pretty cool boss battle with Dark Link.  In all honesty, when I played through it on the 3DS it wasn’t nearly as difficult as I remember from years past. It was still a royal pain, but not as difficult.

But, no amount of training could possibly prepare any gamer for the hellish water level in the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TMNT) game for the NES.  This was by far the toughest, most obnoxious water level in any game; or at least it was for me when I was a kid.  The turtles were tasked with saving a dam.  The level was a maze of sorts.  It came complete with electric barriers that turned on and off, electrified seaweed, some spinning fireball type mechanism, and bombs that needed to be disarmed.  Oh, and you have just over 2 minutes to disarm these bombs?

This stage was the source of a lot of undue childhood stress.  The entire TMNT game was a source of undue stress, but this level didn’t help matters at all.  Luckily, you could switch between all four turtles, provided you have them all still available.  Did I mention you have just over 2 minutes to complete this stage?  It’s enough to make any gamer, young or old, cry profusely.

Enemies that fly may be tough. But when the stage itself is a death trap, that’s when you know you’re in trouble. Water levels have never been easy. That trend doesn’t seem to want to end any time soon. And I say that a good thing. Developers have a tendency to want to hold my hand and they seem afraid to make games as challenging as they used to. But that’s a topic for another time.

Just In Bailey –an homage to the secret code from Metriod, which allowed you to play as Samus Aran without her suit– is an editorial column at Vagary.TV brought to you by Joey Alesia. Each week Joey will challenge you to look at a different perspective of the characters, gameplay, and/or plot in your favorite games. Chat up your thoughts below, or send Joey an e-mail at Joey.Alesia@vagary.tv and remember to follow him on Twitter @wrkngclsswrtr.